A lover should want to bring it...every time

I'm a listener.  I listen to men.  I listen to women.  And mostly I listen to myself.  I'm fully attuned to my needs, my desires, my dreams.  It seems that not everyone is.  So many people are out to get theirs that in the end they overlook the part where they're supposed to be giving.  While Americans will give to charity, to churches, to causes, it seems many forgot to give to their partners.  Regardless of the size of the equipment you're working with or the package it comes in, it should be a point of pride for partners to pleasure each other well.  Not that in the dark, two minutes, missionary style for the purpose of procreation but that hot, midday, sweaty, straight bringing it for pleasure type lovemaking.  It seems too many people aren't getting this, and thus they turn to other outlets such as romance books to get that...to be that heroine who is getting that kind of loving.  Is this a good thing?  For romance writers yes...for relationships, probably not so much.
What say you, lovers?